She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
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