glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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