i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
