It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer