I hope mine doesn't look like that
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
i drank out of a bidet.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize