ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
