Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
