Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
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