He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
