He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Also, beer. Big fan.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize