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that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
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