I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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