And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize