Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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