his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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