Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
