If i come over, it means nothing
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
