If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize