Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
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