Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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