Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Two words: blizzard sex
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
