So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize