yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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