hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize