I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
4 words: hood of his car
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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