Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
