don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Randomize
