happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
