Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Randomize
