Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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