Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.

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(732): Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD. http://tfl.nu/fbqj

Replies (9) Good night (658) Bad night (3207)
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(530): View more from California

When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.

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(530): When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children. http://tfl.nu/7iz1

Replies (109) Good night (1097) Bad night (2974)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night

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(201): i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night http://tfl.nu/v4yn

Replies (73) Good night (1357) Bad night (13012)
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(404): View more from Georgia

to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy

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(404): to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy http://tfl.nu/vv9t

Replies (23) Good night (7388) Bad night (1044)
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(949): View more from California

they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store

(949): View more from California

I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.

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(949): they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store (949): I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on. http://tfl.nu/06qo

Replies (33) Good night (1307) Bad night (3999)
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(409): View more from Texas

First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.

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(409): First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance. http://tfl.nu/3lur

Replies (32) Good night (9864) Bad night (2186)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go

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(215): i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go http://tfl.nu/3dxd

Replies (8) Good night (7064) Bad night (1063)
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(517): View more from Michigan

Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.

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(517): Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise. http://tfl.nu/o3um

Replies (12) Good night (3580) Bad night (1088)
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(+61): View more from Australia

I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.

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(+61): I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame. http://tfl.nu/104i

Replies (10) Good night (1467) Bad night (554)
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(512): View more from Texas

Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.

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(512): Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely. http://tfl.nu/gnvv

Replies (4) Good night (1106) Bad night (566)
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(309): View more from Illinois

And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about

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(309): And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about http://tfl.nu/0jvp

Replies (3) Good night (493) Bad night (1033)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...

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(724): Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out... http://tfl.nu/jn6b

Replies (2) Good night (492) Bad night (1008)
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(506): View more from New Brunswick

Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...

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(506): Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment... http://tfl.nu/gd0h

Replies (6) Good night (1294) Bad night (422)
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(314): View more from Missouri

mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...

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(314): mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again... http://tfl.nu/jopn

Replies (4) Good night (510) Bad night (662)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.

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(508): I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom. http://tfl.nu/auja

Replies (2) Good night (482) Bad night (260)

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