I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I'm just crazy horny about you
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Randomize
