Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
she pinky promised me she was 18
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Randomize
