Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
