there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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