you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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