all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
