Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize