i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize