One blow job doesn not make me gay.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
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