His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
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