i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
