You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
21 Embarrassing Stories From Adults Who’ve Crapped Their Pants
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub