just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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