dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
