The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize