The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
