so that wasnt chicken after all
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize