i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize