i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
