The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Randomize
